I started my natural journey ten years ago. Although I am all about my natural hair and lifestyle, I have not always embraced my hair in its natural state. It took five years into my journey before I started to learn to embrace my hair in its unadulterated texture. My excuse was, it’s just not for me. But honestly, what is more you, than the hair growing out of your scalp. The real issue was, I subconsciously thought the “right” way to wear your hair was pressed, smooth, and shiny. [Brainwashed] Once I found the strength and courage to wear my natural texture, there was no turning back for me. I was on the quest for the perfect curl. I would literally spend hours upon hours on YouTube watching videos on getting the most defined perfect curls. I have definitely come a long way. After years of trial and error with two big chops, I think I may have found my way.
Now that I am trying to find my way as a new mom, I began to question is my hair care regimen going to work for me. As a mother you need practicality! And there was nothing practical about my hair regimen. From the hundreds of dollars I would spend hoarding on products. To the rigorous routine I did weekly. My routine was so time-consuming that I began to dread it. After my baby came, I just neglected it.
After a few months of avoidance, I had to get back to myself. One of the things in life that brings me joy is the effort and care I put into my hair. But I had to find a better way. Today I mostly focus on the health of my hair and not so much obsession over the outcome.
It took some time but now I am in love with every part of my hair. The puffy the frizz and every curl in between. Simply because it is the uniquely uncompromised me. But I know everyone doesn’t feel the same as me. I notice when I am out with a fresh perfectly defined wash n go, I would get adoration from everyone from relaxed to the natural hair girls. But if I am on day 4 or 5 of the wash n go, when my hair in puffy, frizzy, and a curly mess. I would only get compliments from woman who don’t wear their hair in its natural state. From my girls in the natural hair community, I will get drilled questions to see what I’m doing wrong. Because obviously, if your curls not popping you got to be doing something wrong. Seriously, my hair is healthy, long, thick, and thriving so what is the issue? I have to ask, what is the natural hair communities obsession with perfect curls? (IM ASKING FOR MYSELF)
I don’t take issue with a natural taking pride in caring for her hair and defining her natural curl pattern. The issue that comes for me is when you can’t leave your home without a bomb super defined wash n go, twist out, braid out etc. Are you genuinely embracing your natural texture. Your hair in its natural texture, unprocessed and not weighed down with product is your true natural.
It is not my motive to tell any natural how they should wear their hair. I just want to give my perspective on the subject. One of the most beautiful things about a black woman is the texture of our natural hair, there is none like it on earth. And every natural is unique in their own way, no ones natural is the same.
I do feel like the natural community is lacking in the areas of support and inclusion of all textures. I feel if we all began to embrace and fully accept our textures in their unadulterated pure natural states, the community could overcome the issue of texture discrimination some experience. And we can become a more welcoming and inclusive environment to all hair types.